During the next few weeks the stress of life began to weigh heavily upon us. Communication was breaking down and the killer question of "why God?" was rearing its ugly head. We had a decision to make, several months earlier I had been invited to be part of a group that was sending young pastors to Israel to study for two weeks all expenses paid. Naturally I had jumped at the chance to go, literally jumped with a half-twist. I know you are thinking I missed my calling on Dancing with the Stars. Now out of work and a baby on the way could I still go? Our health insurance was ending 5 days after I was to return which left little time to secure employment and get Keri to the doctor. The trip was going to be a little over 2 weeks long with a stop in Rome on the way back for a few days. I was faced with a choice and not for the first time between something I really wanted for myself and fulfilling my responsibility to my family. I knew what the right choice was and my prayers consisted of asking God to find a way for me to fulfill both duties. I was hoping to hear back from the position I was interviewing for before the trip but that didn't look like it was going to happen. God has a sense of humor. He knew the whole time how he was going to work it out, He had a lesson for me to learn amidst this stress."Trust Me!!!"
Sensing what was in it Keri said that she could not accept.
"Saying that places you squarely between Jesus and what He is working on," which in case you are wondering is not a good place to be. Hint: Jesus always wins.
Reluctantly Keri took the envelope with instructions to open it with me. She found me in my office after church and told me what had happened. I opened the envelope. God is good. He answers prayer. He loves His children. He wants to bless us. I went to Israel. Keri went to the doctor.
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Slow Down
"I think we should end the relationship."
Was the phrase I heard two days later at an elders meeting, which is one of the nice ways of saying, "you're fired."
At least I got to turn the tables on Keri a little bit because when I told her that night her response was, "are you joking?"
That phrase seems to be popping up a lot and I assure you this won't be the last mention. I had never been fired before. I don't think I have ever felt more beat down in my entire life. There is something within the soul of a man that produces and innate need to provide. Right or wrong this was a wound that would not easily heal. I felt like I had done something horribly wrong and had just gotten caught. Nausea settled in and I was at a complete loss of how to continue to be a man.
It is times like this when we naturally turn to God for help. Why is that? What makes it so easy to ask God for help in desperate times? Maybe that is it, we don't realized that all times are desperate times. This is part of the lesson that God has been teaching me. I keep waiting for life to "slow" down and become normal. It never does. I constantly need God and I am learning to need Him with the little things. You will be amazed at what God did next.
Was the phrase I heard two days later at an elders meeting, which is one of the nice ways of saying, "you're fired."
At least I got to turn the tables on Keri a little bit because when I told her that night her response was, "are you joking?"
That phrase seems to be popping up a lot and I assure you this won't be the last mention. I had never been fired before. I don't think I have ever felt more beat down in my entire life. There is something within the soul of a man that produces and innate need to provide. Right or wrong this was a wound that would not easily heal. I felt like I had done something horribly wrong and had just gotten caught. Nausea settled in and I was at a complete loss of how to continue to be a man.
It is times like this when we naturally turn to God for help. Why is that? What makes it so easy to ask God for help in desperate times? Maybe that is it, we don't realized that all times are desperate times. This is part of the lesson that God has been teaching me. I keep waiting for life to "slow" down and become normal. It never does. I constantly need God and I am learning to need Him with the little things. You will be amazed at what God did next.
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
The Story
I remember it was a wonderful evening. My wife looked amazing and I didn't look too shabby myself. We were having dinner at our favorite Italian restaurant in Tacoma. I was having Gnocchi with meat sauce. It was full of sausage, I am addicted to pork, and had a wonderful creamy texture to it. I had matched it with a wonderful Pinot Noir, needless to say I was content. Keri did not have a glass of wine, she loves wine, I should have known. Our conversation was lively and I was happy because sometimes that can be hit and miss on dates. Then Keri told me I was going to be a father again.
"Are you kidding?", came out before I could think.
A word to the wise here, do not respond to your wife telling you that you are going to have a baby with the phrase, "are you kidding?" You will live longer.
"No, it is true you are going to be a father," she said.
I really have never been a person who gets speechless, and I secretly believe that this was her goal in telling me this way, but I was speechless. We had been discussing having a second child and we were excited to start trying that summer. Apparently we were better at getting pregnant than we thought. She began to cry and I began to look for good words to say. I told her that I loved her and that I was so excited to do it again. Our 2 year old at the time was getting to the age where she needed a sibling and would be a wonderful big sister.
We left the restaurant arm in arm excited about what God had in store for the next chapter in our lives. Phone call after phone call ensued and pretty soon the family was all abuzz with the wonder of creation and the miracle of birth.
"Are you kidding?", came out before I could think.
A word to the wise here, do not respond to your wife telling you that you are going to have a baby with the phrase, "are you kidding?" You will live longer.
"No, it is true you are going to be a father," she said.
I really have never been a person who gets speechless, and I secretly believe that this was her goal in telling me this way, but I was speechless. We had been discussing having a second child and we were excited to start trying that summer. Apparently we were better at getting pregnant than we thought. She began to cry and I began to look for good words to say. I told her that I loved her and that I was so excited to do it again. Our 2 year old at the time was getting to the age where she needed a sibling and would be a wonderful big sister.
We left the restaurant arm in arm excited about what God had in store for the next chapter in our lives. Phone call after phone call ensued and pretty soon the family was all abuzz with the wonder of creation and the miracle of birth.
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